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Sunday, September 30, 2001

I haven't had much to blog about lately. I've just been keeping busy with my normal daily routine. Shawn and I did go to a housewarming/birthday bash yesterday afternoon and had a great time. Today we took it easy and watched the Packer game.

I plan on doing some major housecleaning this week. I need to finish unpacking and sort through the junk in our closet. Shawn is so organized and has all his stuff put away, while mine is piled up. These are little projects that I save for rainy days, but when the rainy days are here, I'm too lazy LOL. So I'm going to make work of that over the next couple weeks.

Plus Shawn and I need to finish painting our stairway. Once that's done, we can get the carpet laid, and the upstairs will be complete. Then the only major project left is our kitchen. I think we are going to leave the oak cabinets in as they are in perfect condition, though they are too dark. I just can't see painting on top of oak. They really are only 2 shades darker than I would want so I don't think I want to refinish them either. So I will concentrate on the walls and the floor. We are going to put in some laminate hardwood flooring. It's gorgeous and very durable. I'm not sure what I'll do with the walls, but I know I'll need to keep the color light because the kitchen tends to be a bit dark. Hopefully we'll be able to start on the kitchen after the new year.

I'm in the mood to create some new linkware, so I might see if I can come up with something new this week. It's been so long since I created anything. I've just been in this horrible creative slump. It seems I have all these ideas until I sit down to do them. We'll see if I actually do make anything.

Posted by Leah @ 09:50 PM CST [Link]

Tuesday, September 25, 2001

I'm feeling kind of blah tonight and not sure why. I guess I am just tired from my late night last night.

Shawn and I didn't do much over the weekend until Monday. He had off the entire weekend including Monday, so wouldn't you know we decided to paint our stairway and upstairs and then put in new walk-in closets in our old bedroom (which is now our exercise room but still our closet). We kept busy most of the day with that. Nothing like doing everything in one day. I love my new closet! I have wall to wall shelves on one side and double poles on the other. There is finally enough room for all my clothes. Our next project will be the closet in our own bedroom which is even bigger than the other one. The only reason we didn't do that one first is because right now it's piled full of boxes and junk that we are storing. Eventually that will probably be our closet that we use daily.

I'm not too crazy with the paint job we did in the stairway. We already have country blue carpet sitting here which will be installed when we finish painting. I did match the blue of the paint to the carpet but chose a lighter shade. I had really wanted a super light blue with some type of faux finish. The paint dried much brighter and darker than what I wanted, so now I'm not sure what I want to do. We were originally going to rag roll on top of it anyway, but it was such a pain trying to reach the ceiling so we were hoping the blue would do the trick. Now I guess we'll be rag rolling it. I'm just not sure of what color to do on top. I really want to lighten it up. I might try mixing some glaze with a cream and see what happens. I guess if worse comes to worse we can always repaint.

Last night I watched Shawn bowl. Well actually, I met up with his sister and another friend and we sat at the bar and had a few drinks while Shawn bowled. I was out way too late but had such a good time.

I am still exercising on a daily basis and have lost some weight. I've been doing this over a month now and feel great!! If you are bored and want to check my progress here is the url of Choices. I'm on my way to a healthier me and feeling so much better both physically and emotionally.

Posted by Leah @ 09:37 PM CST [Link]

Sunday, September 23, 2001

God Bless America - Tribute Shirts are for sale. This image really touched me when I first saw it so I knew I had to buy a sweatshirt. Plus all the proceeds go directly to the American Red Cross.

Posted by Leah @ 01:49 PM CST [Link]

Last night Shawn and I went with another couple to the Brewers game. I was apprehensive at first being in such a crowded place and a little nervous because of the events of September 11. We had tickets to the 300 Club, and that was an experience to remember! There was a huge bar, buffet, and restaurant overlooking the game with tons of windows and tv's. It was so cool! I had such a wonderful time talking with my friend, Angie. Shawn and Bruce stayed in the upper level and watched most of the game, while Angie and I took a table in the restaurant area and talked and munched on appetizers. After that we all went to Bruce's fireman's dance. That also was a good time. Needless to say, Shawn and I didn't get home until 3 a.m.

So today we are laying around and doing nothing. It's cool and rainy here which is perfect for being lazy.

I have so much to say about the events of the past two weeks but hesitate to get into it as I'm so tired of thinking about it. I still get emotional when I watch the news coverage and hear the horribly, sad stories of the victims. I also get very angry when I hear how some Americans are protesting with Peace rallys. Where was the Peace on September 11? I bet they'd be singing a different tune if one of their family members or friends had been killed. This is not about revenge. This is about justice.

And as far as I'm concerned, President Bush summed it up very nicely and I think this applies also to all of us Americans. "You are either for us or against us."

Posted by Leah @ 01:17 PM CST [Link]

Thursday, September 20, 2001

This is a must read. Thanks Bev for posting it!

Posted by Leah @ 02:38 PM CST [Link]

Wednesday, September 19, 2001

Ok, I think I got the redesign done. I'm sure I'll find a few errors that I'll need to fix yet.

It's a cold and dreary day here in Wisconsin. I am tempted to turn the heat on but am refusing until at least October. It's a good day to stay inside and clean or read a good book. Of course, I'd prefer to read a good book, but I do need to get some cleaning done.

This past week has been the most upsetting week I've had in a long time. What happened last Tuesday has really brought up so many feelings from when I was involved in the tornado. I am so tired of thinking about that though so I keep trying to block it out. I have dealt with it and am trying to move on. My heart just breaks for all the people who are sufferring because of the terrorists.

I haven't done anything constructive on my pc in a long time. I'm not sure if I'll ever finish my new business site. I'm not even sure if I still want to. I am selling my designs in my mom's store so getting the business license would not be a total waste. I'm just not in a creative mood right now and unsure how to proceed. I do have my business account set up also, but I'll be able to use that for buying new supplies as I sell to my mom.

I have been in the mood to create a new dingbat or so I thought until I sat down and tried to work on one. I got 3 tiny characters done. *sigh*

There is just so much I want to do and yet I don't feel like doing any of it. I hope I get out of this slump soon. I could really use the money!

Posted by Leah @ 10:29 AM CST [Link]

Please excuse the mess while I redesign. It's giving me fits! I cannot get my divider to appear correctly. I don't think my files are being rebuilt. So anyway, this site may look like crap for awhile.

Posted by Leah @ 08:59 AM CST [Link]

Monday, September 17, 2001

I've been reading a lot of blogs regarding the terror of Tuesday and one of the common results of the attack that stands out in my mind is that many of the Americans and others from around the world feel as if they lost their innocence and sense of security/safeness.

Unlike most others, I lost my innocence and sense of security in 1996 when a tornado ripped through my house killing my husband and only child (Jesse age 9). That's when I realized I wasn't safe in my own home. I won't go into the details again but I know that's why I've been crying so hard the past week....because I feel so sorry for those who are experiencing that loss of a loved one and also the loss of their innocence and security. It's so horrible and almost seems like too much to handle.

Unlike the tornado though, there is someone to blame for this disaster. I still think the US should do whatever means necessary to get the guilty ones. If that means bombs, ground troups, or more lost lives of US military, then so be it. I really don't think the US has a choice. If we do nothing, that would be wrong, but if we go after those responsible there is going to be more pain and hurt for Americans as well as those countries involved. There really isn't an ideal solution here, or at least none that I've heard yet.

I can only pray for the victims from Tuesday and pray the families are given the strength and grace by God to go through the pain of losing a loved one while trying to rebuild their lives while all this other stuff will be going on. I can only pray for those in the military for their safety and I pray God has mercy on us all and doesn't allow the casualties to be too many. That's all I can do. Whatever happens now is in God's hands, and I trust He knows best.

Posted by Leah @ 05:50 PM CST [Link]

Thursday, September 13, 2001

I cannot believe the opinions I am reading in blogs ets. from people whom I thought were intelligent and knew their stuff. If I read one more statement that reads something to the effect that "violence is not the only answer blah blah blah", I will puke. Gee, do these people really believe that other efforts to combat terrorism haven't been tried first? Where have these people been the last few years?!? It seems to me we've been fighting terrorism for years and now it's time to try a different approach. I am behind whatever decision President Bush makes. It's time we fight back, and if that means attacking those who've done this atrocity, so be it. Going to war will not make me happy nor will I rejoice, but I will know that the United States is doing everything possible to end this war against terrorism.

Guess that goes to show some people aren't as intelligent as they'd like others to believe out here on the internet.

Posted by Leah @ 09:52 PM CST [Link]

Despite what some of you may think, we are at war and have survived the first attack. What difference does it make if the attack is from terrorists or from a government? We are at war with the terrorists and those who harbor them.

I've been reading some blogs and highly disagree with the viewpoints stated, though I do realize everyone is entitled to an opinion, just as I am. Though the Americans may feel love and caring towards the victims and their families, why should we feel that same love and caring for the enemy who caused all this? Sorry, but I don't have it in me. I hope we seek and find the justice not only to those who directly caused this but also to those who indirectly caused this by harboring them.

Posted by Leah @ 03:10 PM CST [Link]

God Bless America brings tears to my eyes.

Posted by Leah @ 11:54 AM CST [Link]

Tuesday, September 11, 2001

Palestinians Celebrate the Attack on the United States. I cannot imagine celebrating an attack on anyone, anywhere. How can they celebrate an attack on the deaths of innocent people? Even if we were at war, attacks would be neccessary but still not a cause to "celebrate". I am sickened to say the least.

Posted by Leah @ 03:08 PM CST [Link]

It's a sad morning as the news unfolds about the plane crashes and attacks on America. I'm glued to the tv for further news and shocked by what I'm hearing. My thoughts and prayers are with the victims and their families.

Posted by Leah @ 10:26 AM CST [Link]

Sunday, September 9, 2001

Thanks to all of you for your support, encouragement, and advice regarding my post below. I have taken it all to heart. The anonymous friend wrote some extremely insightful advice, some of which I already knew, and some where I can see I need to work on. I really appreciate you taking the time to respond.

Last night Shawn and I rented a movie though we never got to watch it as we sat down and had a long talk instead. We have had this same talk in the past, but we went over everything we are feeling, yet again. I do try to use "I" statements rather than "you" but my mistake is that I start out an argument very calmy but when I don't get any results or response I attack. I am working on that though. Communication is so hard. Shawn and I have resorted to writing each other letters when we've had arguments that we can't resolve. In fact, I had written him a 4 page letter yesterday that I ended up trashing because I realized it could have been a carbon copy of the previous letter I wrote one month ago. We discussed a lot of important issues and have agreed to work them out. All we can do is keep trying. I'm so relieved he is willing to talk about everything and even tells me how good he feels after one of our talks. That's got to be a miracle in itself. So we are working on making some changes. I think I finally got him to understand how important it is to me that we have one date per week, at least. Once we get married and have children I know things will change so I'd like to enjoy each other as much as possible now.

Posted by Leah @ 09:12 AM CST [Link]

Saturday, September 8, 2001

I have a hard time sharing my personal life on the web. I know there are real people who read my boring words so I usually guard what I say. I just cannot open up.

I'm changing that today because I really don't have anyone to talk to about this. I don't want to talk to any of my friends because I don't like to talk about Shawn with them. Or I should say, I don't want to say anything bad about Shawn to anyone. I respect him too much to air our dirty laundry, so to speak. So what I do have to say really isn't bad, but it's very private and really is between him and I.

We are having another argument. This particular argument is one that we've had a few times before and one that doesn't seem to be getting resolved. The bottom line is Shawn is very active with sports and friends. He bowls and plays golf, volleyball, basketball, baseball. He also regularly tries to get together with friends to play cards. He is extremely outgoing....the complete opposite of me. So sometimes I wonder where I fit in. He can be so busy with all his "activities" that there doesn't seem to be enough time for me.

I told him a long time ago that it was very important for me to go out on dates on the weekends. I for sure would like him to save Fridays for "our time". I would also like Saturday but don't have a problem with it as long as I get the Friday. Well it seems one thing or another pops up about once a month where he doesn't get home in time to take me out on Friday or he makes other plans etc. and this is unacceptable to me. I have told him so many times how important it is to me that we have our "date" night and yet he still disappoints me. He just doesn't get it.

I think what really gets to me is the fact that he can devote every single last Monday to bowling, and every single Sunday to volleyball etc. and yet he cannot devote one day to me. I am hurt and disappointed. I want to come first with him. He really is wonderful in every other way and treats me like a queen. It's just he is so spontaneous and has trouble saying no to others. I can't understand why when asked to do something on a Friday he can't simply explain that it's Leah's night. Why? Why! This really infurriates me. I don't think I'm asking for much, or maybe I am. I have told him to let me know if this was too much to ask and he always says "of course not". That's just it. He always says what he thinks I want to hear....always Mr. Agreeable.

So I am tired of it. This issue may seem petty or small to some, but to me it's fairly large because it all boils down to how important I am to Shawn. If he can't dedicate one lousy evening or date night a week with me now, how would it be later? I do not want to be the wife who sits home while my husband goes off to his various "activities".

There are other minor problems such as this, and what they mean to me is that Shawn and I really are opposites. It's hard to compromise but we each try. One of Shawn's mottos is "the more the merrier" while I prefer to be alone with him. Put each of us in a crowded room and Shawn would be on stage telling jokes while I'd be laughing from the corner. I go to most of his sports and sit in the sidelines to cheer him on, and I'm okay with that. What I'm not okay with is when he puts those things or his friends before me.

I really am upset and could go on and on about so much more, so I better shut up for now before I say something I may regret.

Posted by Leah @ 11:09 AM CST [Link]

Thursday, September 6, 2001

I really hate PMS! It seems to get worse each month. I crave tomatoes and sweets something fierce. Plus I am so emotional and cry at the drop of a hat. It's this time of month where I get a little down and think about the tornado more too. I am relieved to actually get my period but then I suffer horrible cramps and very heavy flows. I can't win! The worst is when I get my 3 day migraines though. So far I haven't had one this month, knock on wood.

I am so unsure what to do about my new business too. I was all psyched a few months ago, but now I have my doubts. I haven't felt like working on the site in a long time and still am not in the mood. The only positive thing is I'm still creating and printing new designs for my mom's store. They are selling okay there. I just can't decide how I want to set up my website and how legit I want to go. I'm thinking I should get a separate phone line for the business just in case someone needs to reach me, plus I need a fax machine. I wasn't planning on creating a catalog of my designs since I was only going to sell via the web, but now I'm thinking maybe I should. Meanwhile, I just keep procrastinating on the entire thing.

Shawn and I haven't been doing to much. We finally finished our bathroom, and it looks great! Now I'm searching for some pictures to hang in there and think I may get some from my mom's store. I'll have to wait until I have some extra spending money though.

I don't really have anything more to write about so I guess I'll surf other blogs for a bit.

Posted by Leah @ 05:33 PM CST [Link]

Monday, September 3, 2001

We've had a busy weekend so far. We went overnight to stay with a friend in Green Bay on Saturday. I had a very good time and it was nice to see my friend again and get away. We ate at one of my favorite Sports Bars in Green Bay. They have such great margaritas too!

Today we are going to the lake where most of my family are getting together. I'm not sure if I'll ride the jetski but I don't want to get on the paddle boat. That's such good exercise plus I can get some sun. I may bring a good book along and just relax.

Shawn and I have basically finished our bathroom. It looks so much nicer than we had hoped! I still need to decorate it and will take pics after that. We had a bit of trouble putting the chair rail up or getting the corners to match because we were putting it on top of that stupid board that was half way up the wall. There is no way to take the board down without redoing the wall so we just painted on top of it. Anyway, the chair rail is not wanting to match up in the corners because of it. So for now we have it tacked up there and will see if we can improve it. Either way, the bathroom looks like a totally new room and very pretty! We are so pleased.

I haven't been working on my new site at all. I'm in a terrible procrastination mode but hope to have time this week. I work Wednesday and Friday in mom's store though so I won't have much time. I'll get it done eventually. At least I do have one customer already..... mom's store. :)

Posted by Leah @ 12:18 PM CST [Link]

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